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This post has been a long time coming, since shortly after the finale aired in May, but I wanted to let the entire experience stew for me awhile. Since then I’ve rewatched the finale twice, discussed it to no end with my family and a few friends, and now I’m working my way through all of season six on the DVR. And I still think the finale, and the show as a whole, was a glorious piece of work, of art.

The main criticism I’ve seen deals with the shows refusal (or, as some have said, inability) to answer all of the mysteries. I saw it described very eloquently as a failure to pay the bill of dipping into the future, but I still disagree 100%. And here’s why.

The show was never about the mysteries.

Yes, they figured prominently, yes they drove the characters, and yeah, they didn’t always make sense (I still don’t understand how Sayid came back to life after two hours, or what that means about Claire). But in the end—and from the beginning—the show was about a dynamic cast of characters: Jack, Kate, Sawyer, Locke, Hurley, Sun, Jin, Ben, Richard (and Juliet, of course). That’s why the writers incorporated the flashbacks in season one. That’s why shows were usually centered around one or two characters, even while the story might touch elsewhere. And so if that’s what the writers most heavily invested in, that’s what the payoff had to be—not answers.

Because the show was based in reality—or rather, it was based in something I’ll call character reality. The characters were dropped onto the island like us, with our range of views and beliefs, our fears and ambitions, our problems and our pain. There were broken families, bitter disappointments, successes tinged with the unexpected. They were lives interrupted, and except for the more extreme circumstances they had been put in, they could have been us. When the mysteries started, they reacted in a variety of ways, as would be expected from what we know of the world. Some characters were easy to relate to while others took more work. For me, I felt most akin to Shannon and Charlie in the first season.

And for me, this reality can logically mean only one thing. There will never be a minute when all, or even most, of what people want to know, becomes clear to them. This is clear in our own lives, without the added benefit of mysteries. I will never know why my first boyfriend was so nasty to me at the end, or how I passed my intro biology class in college. I will also never understand the physics behind what caused the survivors to jump through time in season five, but it is enough that I accept that the island was jumping through time. Yes, there might be a bigger explanation there (and I’d be willing to bet that the writers know and understand at least a significant part of this), but it had no place in the television show. First off, someone please explain to me how that would have ever fit in with the show.

There were many mystery/answer combinations like this in the show that many fans simply couldn’t accept or weren’t satisfied with. My guess is because they didn’t understand or believe the explanation, but if my ex were to come back now and tell me in a few sentences why he treated me that way, I bet I’d react in a similar manner of disbelief or unacceptance. But what matters here is that those things didn’t matter. Rose says this herself when Desmond meets her in season six, commenting on how they’ve moved through time, and it is clear that while she doesn’t understand it, she accepts it. And if LOST is trying to teach us anything (though I would never call the show didactic), it is this.

What the show promised, the show delivered upon. The show had a very definite and satisfying arc, and to me, it was indeed a masterpiece that I will watch again and again over the coming years.

And also, just to clear this up, the finale in no way meant that they all died in the plane crash. The writers are not laughing at you.

I’ve been back from Europe for almost three weeks now and I’ve finally decided to break my blogging hiatus. Mostly I’ve just been taking it easy here—and looking for jobs of course. My mom had knee surgery a few days before I got home, so I’ve been taking care of her as well.

In the meantime, I’ve completed quite a few of my Day Zero goals in the last month and I thought it was time for an update. Here are a few of the random ones I’ve gone through; I’ll do a post later on the Europe-related ones. Those will have more pictures.

Me and the other MFAers before graduation

1. Get my MFA!

I successfully defended my thesis and got my diploma. I am now a master. I can’t believe it’s over, and I already miss it. I am, however, taking a lengthy break from my writing, although I’m starting to get that itch back. I want to return to it with fervor, not exhaustion. I’ve got work to do on my novel, of course, but I also want to get back to some short story writing. And editing. In some ways, I miss my work with Willow Springs more than anything else.

37. Get ten massages

I started getting massages in October, and they’ve done so much to help with my headaches—more than any medicine I’ve ever taken. I got my tenth one not too long before graduation, but, unfortunately, I can’t afford any more since I don’t have a job. Consequently, the headaches are back as bad as ever. Can’t wait until I’m gainfully employed again.

73. Learn my blood type

My mom came to the rescue on this one. I am B+, as is my sister. My parents are AB+ and O+. I feel like I should have known this a long time ago.

84. Shoot under par at a putt putt course

I did this only a few days ago at the Funtyme in Okemos (it’s practically walking distance from my house). After a rocky start I managed to finish one under par. I’ve never done this before in my life. It was very exciting, made more so by the fact that I beat my putt putt partner by nine strokes (he’ll rename nameless for his pride). Of course, he and his partner did later that evening destroy me and my partner 30-8 in three games of Euchre.

I’ll be out of the country for the next two weeks, so I won’t be posting regularly. I’ll try for the occasional look-what-I-did-today post, but don’t count on it. Happy end-of-July everyone!

Kathryn

I leave Spokane tomorrow, and though I have a party to go to tonight for my program, I’ve already said goodbye to quite a few people I would like to consider friends. They are people that I hope to stay in contact with, people I’d love to come and visit, but I know the base of friendship we have is weak, due to such a short period of time we’ve known each other.

I went to the mall this morning, prior to the World Cup game (which is TIED due to the craziest fluke goal I’ve ever seen at this stage), and as I was walking around, I found myself thinking about what would happen if my life were a movie. It would have happened like this: I would have been walking around, frustrated because I couldn’t find what I wanted, and when I turned around (because that’s always how it happens), I would have found myself face-to-face with one of these people (probably a male, partly because I prefer men to women, but mostly because this is a heteronormative society), and we would have had an intense bonding moment over coffee (even though I don’t drink coffee).

Sometimes it’s depressing that live isn’t more like the movies.

But then that brought me back to writing. In a book (a book of literary fiction), this would have happened instead: I’d have finished my shopping, buying sub-par gifts, not run into anyone I know, and then I’d have gone home. This is what actually happened.

Because in writing, I think it’s important that we put pressure on our characters, and pressure often means not giving them what they want. Maybe instead of running into someone I’d like to see, or not seeing anyone, the literary fiction version of me would run into someone she didn’t like, someone who made her uncomfortable or angry. Because these are the moments when we see someone’s vulnerability, and that’s more interesting than watching someone who gets what she wants.

Well, no one can say it hasn’t been a hectic week. On a personal level, we put down my cat, I had my last day of work, defended my thesis, said goodbye to one of my best friends here, done tons of packing, and tomorrow I’ll graduate. Then, I get on Twitter this morning to find out that college sports decided to explode today. Izzo is considering taking the job in Cleveland, USC is getting reprimanded the way they should have been years ago, and The Big 12 is close to imploding. Of course, the Izzo story is the most near and dear to my heart, and I’ve been following it all day, but everything still seems to be rumor and conjecture at this point. Then, my parents were supposed to get here at 3:30 (you may notice I’m writing this at 5:30), but their flight was delayed, resulting in a missed connection and a seven-hour delay. So now they’re hanging out in Minnesota while I obsessively check the radar because, to top it all off, we’re supposed to have thunderstorms on and off all evening. Yippee!

I hope all of my loyal blog readers (all six or you or so, heh) are having less crazy weeks!

I defended my thesis this morning—successfully, I might add—which means no more thesis updates. From here on out they will all be book updates, the working title of which I’m still too embarrassed to admit. If you want to know, you’ll have to stalk me through the EWU library system and sneak a look at my soon-to-be-bound thesis.

The defense itself went very well. I never got nervous, which I think actually helped a lot. I felt they asked me good, smart questions, and that I learned as much as I explained. I’ve got a real good idea of where to take the book next, and I feel energized. I graduate on Friday, and then my Master’s degree will be official.

There are two things* that I’m not that good at: socializing and being productive consistently over long periods of time. As my grad school experience comes to an end, however, I’ve really amped up both, and now I’m having to balance the two activities (work and play) and not use one to avoid the other. And yes, I really do use work as an excuse to not do social things that make me nervous**.

I defend my thesis in seven days, graduate in nine, and move in eleven. I’m running out of time, and it only recently hit me that I could have done a lot more with my two years. Only in April did I start a strict six-days-per-week writing schedule (that I’ve kept to save for post-thesis relaxation and rejuvenation) and only about three weeks ago did I start being social on a regular basis (all these friends that I waited a year to meet!). I’m glad I got there in the end, but I can’t help wondering at all the time I missed out on.

I turned in my thesis last week, and since then I’ve gotten another story ready for publishing. I’ve also been out dancing a handful of times. And in between all that, I’ve been reading like mad off my thesis list, packed up well over half the apartment, and even found some time to relax. I don’t know what it is, but once I started balancing better, my days seemed to be longer.

*I’m obviously “not that good” at more than two things
**Nervous as in “meeting new people scares me and is a lot of work” not “I might be making poor life decisions if I’m social tonight”

Another Day Zero goal complete! Friday night I read at EWU’s monthly Voiceover. I read a three-page piece and it marked the first time I’ve ever shared my work in public (it counts as public even if the only non-program-affiliated person there was tending bar…). We had a relatively low turnout (probably due to end-of-year stress), but I think that, on the whole, my piece was well received. And someone even told me afterward that I had a good reading voice. So yay! I should have thought to have someone take a picture or something, but apparently I’m not that thoughtful, so you’ll all just have to take my word. If you’re in Spokane, I’ll be reading again at our graduate reading on June 11. Still no idea what I’ll read then—NOT my thesis.

p.s. I have some thoughts on LOST, but I still think I’m not quite ready to share them; I found the finale to be deeply moving and I want a bit more time to let my thoughts percolate; maybe I’ll even rewatch it before blogging about it.

I started this last year, and I thought the series finale mandated a repeat. If you’re so inclined, download the 2010 Favorite Character bracket. If you fill it out (I might do one pre-finale and another post-finale), post your finale four and ultimate winner here. Also available is a brand new death match bracket, asking the question Who would win in a fight between…?

Enjoy! And happy finale watching!

*EDIT* I only just realized that I should have made a typeable PDF, but I didn’t, so you’ll have to print. I put these together in about ten minutes total, so they don’t showcase my PW design skills, sadly.

You can't see very well, but there really is a stud in there. And it's pretty.

I got my ears pierced when I was about seven. I was so scared of the piercing gun that my parents had to bribe me to actually do it—I got a set of earrings, three Boxcar Children books, and a camera. But when I hit puberty, I started having allergic reactions to the earrings, even to the fancy hypoallergenic ones, and I haven’t worn them regularly since. At one point I even went a few years without wearing them. Then, maybe my senior year of undergrad, I tried again, on and off. The holes were still there, but it was always a bit painful to get the earrings in. Finally, about eight months ago, I couldn’t get them in anymore and realized I would have to get them redone.

I had planned on waiting until I was back in MI so that I could go to Splash of Color, but I was in a bit of a bad mood on Friday and used it as a treat instead. You can’t see really well in the picture, but I’ve got studs with light blue sapphires—my birth stone. Now I just have to deal with six weeks of being stabbed in the neck while I sleep.